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Jasmine Coltrane's Journal
20 most recent entries

Date:2014-11-09 16:44
Subject:Seriously
Security:Public

Just posting to keep this account alive.  There is no shame here haha. 

(write some poetry)





Date:2010-08-01 22:41
Subject:
Security:Public

 don't delete my journal :-p

(write some poetry)





Date:2005-05-01 21:20
Subject:
Security:Public

Yeah, Yeah.

I just thought I would update because who knows if they might make this thing diappear. So I graduated back in January but I'm going to walk in two weeks excitment there.... or not. Even anyone who knows me in real life is reading this you are invited and if you can't make it to the graduation you can come to the party/cookout/whatever at the lake afterwards. :-D

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-08-14 15:56
Subject:
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Two weeks! Two weeks before I return for my final semester at good old _______ College. Excitement. That is all.

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-22 00:34
Subject:
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I really like the new show Rescue me on FX! Good stuff that.

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-22 00:33
Subject:
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Take the quiz: "Are you an independent thinker?"

A Free Thinking Rebel
Congratulations. You are a free thinker and a rebel. You blaze the hardest trails. Not only do you dare to think your own thoughts in the face of pressure, but you will stand up for them and fight the crowd.

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-20 21:45
Subject:
Security:Public
Mood: hyper

I'm in a good mood and boy am I happy of course the shits gonna hit the fan this weekend but it's all good right now I'm very happy.

Currently reading Bill Clinton's My Life and Persuasion by Jane Austen . I love Jane Austen and this was the last book that she wrote and I had never read it and it's good very much so.

You've guessed it I'm totally and completely ignoring my senior seminar dangit. I don't know what my topic is going to be :-p hehe and right now I don't care.

Bah, was going stir crazy for a while this town makes me feel trapped.

I shan't be living in this state much less this town, and hopefully I will be more happy were ever I decide to reside right now I'm looking at living in Chicago for fall, winter, and spring and owning a ranch in Colorado for the summer months of course this is in line with me being a future DA, possible running for the senate (yay I'm thinking about that again), being a volunteer fire-fighter, and owning a resturant were I have a certain night that I'm the resident chef.

hmmmmmm ......

I'm babbling I think I'm going to end this post.

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-13 09:05
Subject:Productivity
Security:Public
Mood: complacent

Does anyone have any idea what I should do for a senior seminar/thesis in the field of biology. I refuse to do medical stuff but I may have to break down anyway and it has to have had a substantial amout of research notes availible because "your topic should have a strong research background and we would prefer that you have conducted your own research" thanks for the heads up. Really I appreciate this why didn't you tell me this back in my sophmore year when this would have helped me. I'm already coming back for an extra semester as it is.

In other news, has anyone else noticed that a lot of famous people are dying of late. It's really scary. Maybe this has been happening alot and I just noticed it because ya know I'm getting to be that age were a lot of people that I'm familar with are elderly and dying. That's completely and totally depressing. But so is life sometimes there are always good times. I've just been in a major funk but I think I'm resurfacing.

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-13 08:41
Subject:I'm an idiot and I'm coming off as an idiot in this post.
Security:Public

I don't know I'm not trying to share all my business but I see this journal as an outlet and although you may think your getting the whole picture your only getting a refraction of what is going on inside this head.


I'm so confused. I'm so so confused. I think I'm going to call some of my friends from college today. Chat with them for a while. Call some friends from church and have a little chat. Whenever I return to A. I feel so so isolated at times and when you do something stupid. I mean really if I did something so bad that all communication is blocked I don't know. I'm sorry. Losing a friend when I have never forcible lost a friend before kinda hurts and the person is so nice that you can't possible fault them for it means that you obviously are the one in the wrong and I don't know what I did I really don't. I mean I talk to much I have a tendency to babble. I'm usually not nosy but I have nosy of late. I guess I was annoying because I tried to get people to come to an MK session at my house. Which completely fell through what the heck am I leper now.

I'm just delusional that's it. My perception of what is going is just warped. I live kinda in a virtual world for about 2 to 3 months out of the year. Do only way that I communicate with most people is through emails and AIM even if they are less then 30 minutes away. Most of my friends are not online much over the summer months they have jobs and I don't ane even after that they have boyfriends and a license and I don't (loser). Not about the boyfriend though. I mean with the state I'm in that's a totally out of the question. Besides to be honest I'm not looking to good right now either.

I don't know I'm not trying to share all my business but I see this journal as an outlet and although you may think your getting the whole picture your only getting a refraction of what is going on inside this head.

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-13 00:30
Subject:
Security:Public

This is comforting only three things have spiked since the last time I took this test. Well well will you look at the the narcissitic one. It seems I'm conceited. Thanks that's comforting :-D

It's all good. I think that I recover from my issues. I'm just going to have to talk to my brother and sister because this problem is tearing me up and I'm kinda worried about school. IT's all good. I will not go down this road turning into this person I don't recognize her. So I lied about the whole thing with the private posting kiss it. I'm feeling good and M if you don't want to speak with me again I understand. Ugh. Fool fool fool. I've got to get this under control. Me now and me 3 years ago two totally different people.

DisorderRating
Paranoid:Moderate
Schizoid:Low
Schizotypal:Moderate
Antisocial:Low
Borderline:Low
Histrionic:Low
Narcissistic:High
Avoidant:Low
Dependent:Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:Low

-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-13 00:17
Subject:
Security:Public

Can I get anymore juvenile. I think not. Feeling the lowest of low. I use to think before I acted and usually my actions weren't so irrational. I'm 22 years old and this is how I act. Yes yes my next few post well be about this because somewhere along the line I developed an obessive personality I think it surfaced in the past year along with my other ailments. I've turned into a complete pyschoatic it's official. Ha! Things change and sometimes I forget that little fact. So sue me I live in a bubble. I care about others a lot but am also self absorbed it seems. Don't know I'm hating myself write now though oh yes and I think just figured out what I did wrong but maybe not. To nosy or something maybe who knows I really don't. I promise if I make anymore post tonight I will make them private. Ugh.

(write some poetry)





Date:2004-07-12 23:57
Subject:
Security:Public

I'm self centered and tonight I reacted away I should have. My apologies I've always known that I'm self-centerd to some extent it's amazing to what extents I will take things. Fuck it.

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-12-26 13:19
Subject:
Security:Public

Wow! Is all I have to say there are some beautiful people out there. Those that are and those that have past. And for those of you that don't know beauty is an all encompassing term inside and out at least for me it is.

It's amazing how we get caught up in our on little worlds and never pay attention to whats going on in other people's lives. Totally selfish actually and the only way will ever advance is to show compassion and not just for people we know but complete strangers too. With that in mind I don't know how I could ever practice law in any specific area because either way its going to boil down to self-centered selfishiness maybe maybe I should look into doing missionary work again and get off my lazy ass and make an A in organic chemistry in the spring and try to get a freakin A for the whole year.

Damnit :-P


And the post that I made before this (Friends Only people) totally sucked and was self centered and I should have used cutaway tags.

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-12-22 23:53
Subject:
Security:Public

Well it's be so long that I almost forgot my password what the heck. Nothing really to say I am still breathing and indecisive as ever.

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-08-27 14:45
Subject:
Security:Public
Mood: blah

Research! Research! Research! The research part of writing so sucks I guess that's why they always say write what you know about. Well sometimes you can't always do that. I must go have things to do like research and other such things like ::cough:: packing.

I hate packing. I hate shopping for school relate crap. I hate being sick and whining (Usually don't whine but this is very bad timing).

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-08-23 17:43
Subject:
Security:Public

Should a person edit their journal entries? I don't really care myself I know I'm not an idiot even though I sound like one sometimes. :-D

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-08-23 16:33
Subject:
Security:Public

What's a turn single? :-p

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-08-23 16:22
Subject:Adventures in learning how to drive.
Security:Public

Things I have done wrong today and how many times I did them according to my father.

1) Come to a complete stop before looking in both directions to see if the road is clear. (Lost count)
2) Always glance at the other lane by turning your head and actually looking before passing a vehicle on a multiple lane road. (Twice)
3) Use turn single in parking lot ( Three times)
4) DO NOT SPEED (Once)
5) Turning to fast (Most turns I made)

Personal notes to myself.

1) Do not ever get a big car to drive (Example: Cadillac Seville Deville or the big ass SUV that blocked my view today). I want the PT Cruiser that my brother and sister-in-law rented from the airport today.

2) Do not starve yourself for the whole day before driving (Extreme light headedness)

3) Hurry up in get your license so that you may drive by yourself.


The good news is that I did not, nor did anyone in the immediate vicinity of me, harm anyone will driving today if I can just keep it that way for the rest of my life I'll be set.

Thank you and have a good day.

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-08-22 09:00
Subject:Clarification
Security:Public

Here's a post for you people out there on my friends list that may now currently think I'm 15 or something because I'm getting my driver's license now. Nope that's not the case. I'm just that sad I'm getting my licenses at the age of 21 because for the past 7 years I have had issues with driving and let's just leave there it happened when I was 14 and it was made even worse when someone tried to help when I was 15 and since then I have stubbornly refused. Hey life goes on and I'm starting to realize that hey you need to drive especially when your now starting to turn into a bum ::points finger to herself::. So yeah talk to you later.

(write some poetry)





Date:2003-08-22 08:51
Subject:Success!
Security:Public

Am alive went driving through four different small towns. I think my dad's happy I didn't do any damage to him or his car (He's taking a nap). Woohoo funniness. Tons of people passed me because I went the speed limit oh who cares I'll be like them some time soon. Anyway I feel much better not having the feeling of doom over me. I am going out again this evening. My dad said I wasn't near ready for the driving test. Rolling stops need I say more. He can't expect me to be perfect I think and his super nice car is way different then my slightly not hoopde?! Anyway most go maybe this time around I'll continue to update. I am so sad but hey phobias will do that to you. Mind over matter and all that jazz.

Jas

(1 poem | write some poetry)




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